3 ways to tell you’re focused on the wrong things and how to fix it

I’m sure we all can relate to how it feels to have a million things going on in your head at once. And now, in addition to having all the information one could ever want at our fingertips, it almost feels like a responsibility to be, at least, somewhat knowledgeable of what’s going on.

Total student loan debt is over $1.48 trillion, Beyonce just announced she’s going on tour, and we’re down to our last northern white rhino male left in the world.

Between family, ambitions, our pockets, and all else, it’s easy to lose focus on one thing or be too focused on an other. It’s possible, in an effort to be as in tuned as possible, that we bring in the very junk that clutters our pathway to success.

https://giphy.com/gifs/home-girlfriend-success-pbuK5WWsRwpu8

That’s why in this sea of hot takes, ideologies, and headlines, it’s imperative to stay in touch with what you believe and preserve that which you know you want for yourself. Remembering our purpose and revisiting our personal thesis of being helps us move through the noise, even if it’s the noise we let in ourselves.

Our thoughts should be held to a standard and a precedent must be set to police where our minds are allowed to wander.

When we’re intentional about focusing on the right things, we’ll start seeing our behavior follow suit. It’s all about conditioning our minds on where we want to go, not on how we feel.

Here are three signs that you’re focusing on the wrong thing:

It breeds negativity

When negativity strikes, it sticks. Controversy has a magnetic draw; it’s like quicksand: no matter how bad we want out, once we’re in, we can’t get away. That’s why it’s best to avoid negativity at all costs.

As cliche as it has become, ‘good vibes only’ are truly words to live by. Whether it’s a WorldStar fight circulating online, family gossip, or a someone talking down on you, we’re better people when we choose to stay out of it.

https://giphy.com/gifs/fight-ouch-punch-F7pcY0yD3a0qQ

When we channel our energy constructively instead of reciprocating the bad, we keep our mood clean and our spirits lifted. Negativity loves company, and when we succumb to its advances, we become negative, too.

There will always be disadvantageous circumstances that we will have to face. How we get through, however, is not by focusing on the hardship, but by overcoming.

If negativity surrounds something, detach and relay your attention elsewhere.

---

It’s not productive

Running in place is probably one of the worst feelings, no matter where you are in life. It’s like you’re in a rut and life at that moment in time is impossible to figure out.

These times of redundancy are a product of focusing on nonproductive things.

When we focus on issues out of our control, we’re doing nothing more than setting ourselves up for disappointment.

That’s how many of us get stuck going nowhere fast: we keep reacting and chasing what we’ll never catch instead of manipulating the resources in front of us.

We can’t sulk over past failures, current disappointments, or the ones that inevitably lie ahead. Our job is to keep going and to keep adjusting. That’s how you learn and improve.

When we focus on the school we didn’t get into, the weight we wish we lost, or the pain we currently feel, we give those things power. Instead, focus on the school you’ll apply to next, the gym membership you’ll invest in, and how good you’ll feel once you’re well.

If you’re not benefitting or plotting to benefit from the endeavor, then it’s a waste of time. Focus on what advances you, not what makes it hard to advance.

---

It’s not true

I’m convinced that we give lies too much power. Lies we don’t even need to Google are the ones we focus on, and it’s all because we choose to give them attention. It’s actually quite simple: if it’s not true, pay it no mind. This will not only give us a peace of mind, but it’ll keep us locked in on our goals.

All throughout our lives, we let non-truths permeate our mind and take reign over what we do and how we live.

Who said you couldn’t be a recording artist? Just because you haven’t tried doesn’t mean you’re not capable. What does it matter if no one gets your fashion sense or taste in music? Someone else’s validation does not make it a truth.

Half of the task is finding what our truths are, then focusing on that and nothing else. If what you’re focused on is in direct opposition to what you define as true for yourself, it’s best to sever ties with.

Avoid negativity, welcome positivity, and know your truths. Then and only then will the pathway to where you ought to be become much clearer.